Friday, May 22, 2015



ANNOUNCEMENT  !ANNOUNCEMENT !

THE BOOK HAS BEEN ACCEPTED FOR PUBLISHING BY ELECTIO PUBLISHING AND A TENTATIVE RELEASE DATE OF NOVEMBER 17, 2015.  HOORAY!!! 

I AM VERY EXCITED FOR ALL OF YOU TO HAVE THIS BOOK TO HELP YOU IF YOU'VE BEEN SEXUALLY ABUSED IN ANYWAY.  CHAPTER 14 ALONE IS WORTH THE PRICE OF THE BOOK.  THIS CHAPTER FOCUSES MAINLY ON THERAPY AND HAS SOME FUNNY STORIES AND SOME SERIOUS STORIES AND INFORMATION.  IT'S A MUST READ FOR ANYONE ABUSED IN ANY WAY OR IF YOUR EGO HAS TAKEN A BEATING OVER THE YEARS!!!

THERE WILL BE UPDATES AS THE RELEASE DATE OF NOVEMBER 17TH GETS CLOSER.  IT WILL BE AVAIABLE THROUGH ELECTIO PUBLISHING http://www.electiopublishing.com/ OR BY GOING TO AMAZON.  IF YOU'RE NOT IN A HURRY FOR THE BOOK!! PLEASE BUY IT ON ELECTIO AS I MAKE A LITTLE MORE MONEY.  BUT I MOSTLY CARE THAT YOU JUST GET IT SO GO TO AMAZON IF YOU WANT THE PAPERBACK IN TWO DAYS. 

I WANT TO THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT AND ASSISTANCE DURING THIS JOURNEY!!  HANG IN THERE JUST A BIT LONGER AND YOU'LL HAVE A GREAT BOOK.  EVEN IF YOU BUY THE BOOK ON ELECTIO YOU CAN LEAVE AN AMAZING REVIEW ON AMAZON.  REVIEWS ARE VERY IMPORTANT!! SO PLEASE LEAVE A GOOD REVIEW ON AMAZON http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/handle-buy-box/ref=dp_start-bbf_1_glance  IF YOU DON'T LIKE THE BOOK, LEAVE YOUR REVIEW HERE UNDER COMMENTS OR ON OUR WEBSITE http://www.deliverusfromevil.us/ .  AGAIN THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT AND YOUR REVIEWS.

Deborah Hunter-Marsh
  with Rebecca Hunter

Thursday, May 21, 2015

7 Reasons it’s Time to Move On and Embrace Change


 
Change isn’t part of the process; it is the process.  The bad news: nothing is permanent.  The good news: nothing is permanent
 
 
Today, with the help of a friend, Brian Gardner (check out his inspiring site), we made the first design change to our site in nearly a decade.
Yes, a decade.
If you think about how drastically the internet and technology has matured in the past ten years, it’s impossible not to wonder why we didn’t update our site design sooner.
All details aside – and there are plenty of them – the answer is: Resistance to change.
Sure, in the past we’ve preached about prioritizing content over design.  And yeah, it wasn’t broken, so we didn’t absolutely need to fix it.  But these rationalities were just covering up the fact that we were stuck in our comfort zones.
In this subtle, yet obvious way, we weren’t practicing what we preach.  But thankfully we finally caught ourselves and came to our senses.
And as we rolled out the new design this morning, I couldn’t help but appreciate the synchronicity of this short email from a coaching/course student that popped up in my inbox at the same exact time (I’m sharing this with permission):
“I just wanted to send a quick note of thanks.  Today marks a full year that I’ve been eating right and working out regularly, which is, as you know, something I resisted for years.  This time last year I weighed 312 pounds.  When I saw my weight on the scale at the doctor’s office I knew it was time for a change.  And after some much-needed coaching from you and Angel, a year of exercising my willpower, and using no dieting pills or gastric bands or anything, I went back to the doctor’s office for my annual check-up.  ‘199 lbs,’ my doctor said.  ‘You know, your positive lifestyle change just added roughly 10 years to your life expectancy.’  My 9-year-old daughter, who came with me, grabbed my hand and said, ‘I look forward to spending those extra years with you, daddy.’”
Wow!  Talk about a beautiful reminder to embrace positive change in your life.
Yes, you may feel resistance, like Angel and I did with our site’s redesign.  It may not be easy.  But we all have to stretch our comfort zones and move our lives forward.
The truth is, living is a risk.  Happiness is a risk.  If you’re not a little scared sometimes, then you’re not doing it right.  Don’t worry about mistakes and failures, worry about what you’re giving up when you don’t even try.  Worry about the life you’re not living and the opportunities you’re forgoing, as you merely exist in the safety of your comfort zone.  Give yourself permission to be one of the people who survived doing it wrong, who made mistakes, but recovered from them and grew into your strongest self.



http://www.marcandangel.com/2015/05/20/7-reasons-its-time-to-move-on-and-embrace-change/

 


Wednesday, May 20, 2015

Photo Cred: Dreamstime

Wednesday, May 13, 2015

Tuesday, May 12, 2015


Is it Time to Divorce Your Family?
5/4/2015
 
To survive growing up in a sexually abusive home, you had to deny what you witnessed, felt, and experienced.  You had to numb and repress it.  Like every child, you thought you could trust your family, the people who were supposed to love and care for you.  Instead, they hurt you and ignored you.

This is your reality as a sexually abused child.  This is your “truth.”  An important part of the healing process is to accept this truth on a conscious level.  However don’t make the mistake of seeking validation for the reality of your past from the family that ignored it.  You may be ready to heal, but that doesn’t mean they are. 

The sooner you stop seeking validation from the “wrong people,” the faster you’ll recover.  If the wrong people are your family, then it might be time to divorce them and walk away for a while. 

Healing is the process of identifying your negative beliefs and exchanging them for new, positive, empowering beliefs.  Going back to the people who refuse to validate your truth only reinforces those negative beliefs.

Your greatest support and validation will come from fellow survivors.  These are the people you meet online and locally in groups for the victims of child sexual abuse.  You’ll also receive tremendous support and guidance from professional Abuse Survivor Coaches, who are often abuse survivors themselves. 

These people are the ones who “get” where you’re coming from.  Your reality is their reality.  Your truth is their truth.

Sometimes you have to divorce the family you were born into and walk away.  Coaches and your fellow survivors are the ones who will validate your truth, nourish your soul, and support you on this exciting healing journey you’ve undertaken.  

Walk toward them.  They’re the “family” you can count on.

********

Were you sexually abused as a child?  Is your life stuck as an adult, and you can’t seem to move forward?  Svava Brooks is a child sexual abuse survivor, as well as a certified CSA instructor and an Abuse Survivor Coach.  She offers private coaching sessions by phone or skype for child sexual abuse survivors just like you.  For more information, email svava@educate4change.com or call 619-889-6366.  Let Svava help you move forward again on your healing journey!
 
 
Irish Courts Are Enabling & Encouraging Pedophiles To Live In Ireland

Anybody that follows my work and or writings will know that for a long time now I have spoken out about how horrific the level of abuse is in Ireland. Today another situation has arisen that will shock so many people around the world, yet it doesn't shock me as it is part of the over all IGNORANCE IN IRELAND BY THE COURTS & THE GOVERNMENT.
Ireland is a Haven for Pedophiles from around the world, the reason for this is very simple if they don't register with the police in Ireland on arrival, then unless they are notified or an incident happens they won't know that this predator is here. Ireland does NOT HAVE A PUBLIC SEX OFFENDERS REGISTER but it needs one and fast. Below is an incident that happened in a court in Co Galway today which is in the West of Ireland, one of the most popular tourist areas for anybody visiting Ireland and especially for those from America, as Galway is the home of Connemara but it is also the home of some of the most horrific, barbaric and hidden Child Abuse and their hidden Graves that Ireland has ever seen. Yet the courts, and in particular this judge seems to want to protect the Pedophile he had in front of him today rather than the Irish Public and more importantly all children that are near or around this Convicted Sex Offender. I would seriously question as to whether or not this judge is himself a Predator, perhaps he is a Pedophile and is part of a so far unknown or undiscovered Pedophile Ring. As we all know that many judges in the past worldwide are involved in this type of behavior and they cover up and or allow those that appear before them as defendants to escape accountability. Perhaps if Judge Rory Mc Cabe who sits in the Circuit Court in Galway is to be held personally responsible for when this Pedophile Rapes and destroy's the life of his next victim an innocent child he will rethink his position. Not that he would be held accountable as in Ireland those in power, those with money and those that abuse are always the one's to escape any type of consequences for their actions and are seldom held accountable, other than perhaps a slap on the wrist.
This is the incident that I am speaking about and it is beyond believe to see that once again this has happened in Ireland. A Registered UK Convicted Sex Offender by the name of Sean Johnson who is 34 years of age, was in court in Galway today to face charges of failing to register as a sex offender in Ireland. He had been had been running talent competitions and auditions for children as young as seven years of age in not just Galway but also in Cork for months. He was using at least two aliases in this time in both locations. His objective was to work with kids as he is a Pedophile and to also hide his identity so that he could do this for as long as possible. He was eventually arrested in February 2015. He had been using the false names to evade detection and had rented a room at a Library to hold fake video auditions for children, from the age of just seven years & up, promising their parents and agents that they would be cast in children’s TV series. As a Convicted Sex Offender  this work is totally illegal and taking any images or video's of children considering that he was incarcerated for child pornography should have set off huge Red Flags in the mind of the judge in Galway as he was up to his old tricks again, he was just grooming his latest victims.
He was in court for Not Registering As a Sex Offender, he was NOT charged with breaching his sentence in the UK which he had reduced due to good behavior that stated he was NEVER to work with children again. Yet in Ireland he got away with this as the Judge felt the original sentence of 10 months was too harsh and dropped all other charges against him.He then released him immediately and he proceeded to walk down the city streets of Galway with all those children and potential victims within his reach.
He had arrived in Ireland  just days after he had been released from a UK prison,  having served three months of a four-month sentence imposed on him for the possession of child pornography.  As part of that sentence, the UK court had directed he never work with children again.Yet in Ireland he was  given a slap on the wrist, the children that were at risk didn't matter, the fact that he was a convicted Sex Offender who had been convicted of Child Pornography and he was now making video's of young children didn't matter, No he had rights and the Judge in Galway today allowed this predator to walk free, another sex offender on the streets of Ireland.
Ireland is like a Candy Store for any and all Abusers - Pedophiles & Sex Offenders, when you have No laws that will protect the victims until they are basically a statistic of murder and No Courts that are educated on what Abuse and or Pedophiles are then how can the children and people of Ireland be protected. I have no hesitation in stating publicly that in my mind the Judge today Rory McCabe has not just Endangered the life and innocence of children all over Ireland, but he has Enabled this Pedophile to Abuse and to  escape accountability for his actions. This Judge should be brought before the Bar and questioned as to why he supported the release of a Convicted Pedophile in to the streets of Ireland when he had more than enough to not just ensure that he served his original sentence but to also add to it on the grounds of him breaching his original release conditions.
I have called for a long time now for a Public Sex Offenders Register in Ireland as we can't rely on the laws of the land, the courts or the police to protect our children. We all have the right to ensure that those who are a threat or danger to our children are known to us, we don't want to live beside them, they shouldn't be allowed to work with kids, assume new identities , live beside where children play, be near schools as in doing so that is allowing them to pick out their next victim or victims , to groom them over time and to then destroy their lives forever more.Once a child's innocence is taken it is gone forever, no sentence can ever retrieve what and who that child once was. But at least it will protect other children from having to suffer whilst he is incarcerated.Those that Rape and or Abuse children have lost all rights to be treated as humans as they didn't afford any rights to their victims or their families, so why should they be given the luxury of protection because they were caught.
IRELAND WAKE UP - PROTECT YOUR CHILDREN - DEMAND THAT RIGHT -DEMAND THAT THE COURTS DO THEIR JOB - MAKE YOUR VOICES HEARD
Below is the link to a petition that I have set up for a Public Sex Offenders Register to be put in place in Ireland as we have to protect the adults of our future who are the children of today. The laws and the Government won't do it so we as a people need to be parents and protect not just our own children but all children.As their voices are not heard and the risk to them is petrifying with more and more Pedophiles arriving into Ireland on a daily if not hourly basis.Ask yourself this question Do you know how many pedophiles are living in your area ? Do you know what he/she looks like ? Do you know what the signs of grooming are with your child ? Do You Care Enough To Be Their Voice & Protect Them ?
https://www.change.org/p/irish-government-demand-a-full-open-sex-offenders-pedophile-register-with-mandated-compulsory-life-sentence-meaning-life-for-pedophiles
This issue will as always get little or no media attention in Ireland as abuse is tolerated , abuse is part of society and that is why we have such ignorance as Judge Rory McCabe allowing a Pedophile to walk the streets when he should be locked up behind bars and then returned to the UK where they will also lock him up for breaching his early release terms. Shame on you Judge, how you can sleep at night I don't know and I would ask if this pedophile had abused, raped or used an image of your child or your friends child would you have been so lenient. I wonder if  you really know what a Pedophile is and can do as if not then I will gladly educate you on the facts as until you know what these predators are capable of there is no way that you should be sitting in court and judgement and allowing them to be free. I will educate you on Abuse, Sex Offenders, Pedophiles so that then you can do your job correctly and pass down the sentence that is the minimum that should have been served rather than putting innocent children at risk because you are ignorant to the reality of Pedophiles. 

Monday, May 11, 2015

Former Social Worker Arrested For Sexually Abusing Child
 
 
A former social worker and church worship leader is accused of sexually abusing a child over several years, and detectives believe there may be more victims.
 
Dexter Carl Pleasure, 51, of Rancho Cucamonga, was arrested Monday and charged with oral copulation of a child under the age of 10 and continual sexual abuse of a child under the age of 10.
 
Pleasure worked for more than 20 years as social worker with a private foster care agency, and had access to numerous children over the years, according to the Rancho Cucamonga Police Department.
 
Neighbors at Pleasure’s apartment complex, where he lived with his wife and four children, said they were not surprised at the news.
One woman, who did not want to be identified, said she told her daughter to be cautious around Pleasure.
"Whenever my daughter would go in and out, he'd follow her," she said. "I'd say 'keep your eyes open, girl.'"
She also said she doubted his churchgoing activities.
"I never saw him get dressed to go to church," she said.
Mike Clark said he got into an argument recently with Pleasure over how he was treating his children.
"As far as parenting skills, terrible," Clark said. "And the wife — I lived in those apartments seven years and I only saw her three times."
A background check showed no previous convictions, and a former supervisor at the foster agency in Corona where Pleasure worked said he was a "paper pusher" and did not have access to children.
Pleasure was arrested after a tipster reported that he had confessed to abusing a child over a long period of time.
Clark said he hoped the arrest would help any other possible victims come forward.
"Encourage you to come forward. Please take that step and stop this," he said.
Pleasure is being held in lieu of $350,000 bail.
Anyone with information is asked to call Detective Ryan Ford of the Rancho Cucamonga Police Department at 909-477-2800. Anonymous tips can be made by calling 800-78CRIME.
 
 

16 Simple Ways to Love Yourself Again


Learn to love yourself first, instead of loving the idea of other people loving you.

“Today I lost the respect of a few people I love, and the desire to kill myself, when I finally took your advice and told everyone the truth about who I really am and what I’ve decided to do with my life.  In a nutshell, I’ve chosen to love and honor myself, instead of convincing others to do it for me every day.”
Those are lines right out of a live chat session I had this morning with a longtime reader and recent course member of ours.  Although this person asked to remain anonymous, they gave me permission to share this with you, and I’m so glad they did.
Because the greatest struggle in life is the struggle to accept, embrace and love ourselves, with all of our imperfections.  To be 100% honest about who we are, how we feel and what we need.  To stop discrediting ourselves for everything we aren’t, and start giving ourselves credit for everything we are.  And to be aware that not everyone we love will agree with us every step of the way, and to be OK with it.
We have to learn to be our own best friends, because sometimes we fall too easily into the trap of being our own worst enemies.  We love the idea of others loving us, and we forget to love ourselves.
What we must realize is that our greatest task is not about discovering self-love; it’s about breaking down the walls we have built against it.  When we have the courage to push through these walls – to know and embrace ourselves, despite our humanness, our flaws, and our rejections – we also open the door to connecting in more caring, empathic and intimate ways with others who are truly worth loving.
Which is why it’s time to…

http://www.marcandangel.com/2015/05/10/16-simple-ways-to-love-yourself-again/
 

Sunday, May 10, 2015

5 Ways to Find Beauty in Painful Life Changes


Stepping onto a brand new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation that no longer fits, or no longer exists.



The reason for our suffering, in all walks of life, is our resistance to life’s inevitable changes.
And life is all changes.  To have lived is to have changed often.
Sometimes this is hard to accept…
What you have today may become what you had by tomorrow.  You never know.  Things change, often spontaneously.  People and circumstances come and go.  Life doesn’t stop for anybody.  It moves rapidly and rushes from calm to chaos in a matter of seconds, and happens like this to people every day.  It’s likely happening to someone nearby right now.
Sometimes the shortest split second in time changes the direction of our lives.  A seemingly innocuous decision rattles our whole world like a meteorite striking Earth.  Entire lives have been swiveled and flipped upside down, for better or worse, on the strength of an unpredictable event.  And these events are always happening.
However good or bad a situation is now, it will change.  That’s the one thing you can count on.
And while I resist change, and suffer sometimes just like everyone else, I have learned to adapt.  I have learned to be flexible and look for the beauty in life’s changes, even when they aren’t what I want.  But before we get into how to do that, let’s take a look at…

 http://www.marcandangel.com/2015/05/06/5-ways-to-find-beauty-in-painful-life-changes/#more-838


Monday, May 4, 2015

10 Things to Remember About Toxic Family Members

Family is supposed to be our safe haven.  Sometimes, however, it’s the place where we find the deepest heartache.

Letting go of (or breaking up with) a toxic friend, boyfriend or girlfriend is one thing, and there’s plenty of advice out there for doing so, but what about letting go of a toxic family member?
Most of us are not in a position to just walk away, nor do we feel that we want to, or that it’s the right thing to do.  So what do we do when a family member is literally spoiling our lives with their toxicity?  How do we deal with our feelings of obligation, confusion, betrayal and heartache?
First and foremost, you must accept the fact that not everyone’s family is healthy or available for them to lean on, to call on, or to go home to.  Not every family tie is built on the premise of mutual respect, love and support.  Sometimes “family” simply means that you share a bloodline.  That’s all.  Some family members build us up and some break us down.
Second, you must understand that a toxic family member may be going through a difficult stage in their lives.  They may be ill, chronically worried, or lacking what they need in terms of love and emotional support.  Such people need to be listened to, supported, and cared for (although whatever the cause of their troubles, you may still need to protect yourself from their toxic behavior at times).
The key thing to keep in mind is that every case of dealing with a toxic family member is a little different, but in any and every case there are some universal principles we need to remember, for our own sake:

  1. They may not be an inherently bad person, but they’re not the right person to be spending time with every day. – Not all toxic family relationships are agonizing and uncaring on purpose.  Some of them involve people who care about you – people who have good intentions, but are toxic because their needs and way of existing in the world force you to compromise yourself and your happiness. And as hard as it is, we have to distance ourselves enough to give ourselves space to live.  You simply can’t ruin yourself on a daily basis for the sake of someone else.  You have to make your well-being a priority.  Whether that means spending less time with someone, loving a family member from a distance, letting go entirely, or temporarily removing yourself from a situation that feels painful – you have every right to leave and create some healthy space for yourself.

http://www.marcandangel.com/2015/05/03/10-things-to-remember-about-toxic-family-members/

 
 


Saturday, May 2, 2015